The Good News!
We went to the Dr. For my 20 ish week check up and Ultrasound. I was super nervous for some reason, not for finding out the sex, but was worried something was wrong. Well our little baby kept their genitals hid and tucked away but finally towards the end sprawled out and we could clearly tell that it was a ................
BOY!!!!
We kind of expected this. I'm not sure why, I just had a feeling. We had the Dr. guess and he thought it was a boy, according to the Chinese calendar it was supposed to be a boy, the ring trick said it was a boy, pencil on a stick said it was a boy, and all my symptoms pointed towards a boy ( I have been craving fresh fruits/veggies, and not so much sweet stuff). I am still getting sick at times, usually it's because of smells ( I have to plug my nose when walking through the rendezvous) or thoughts about something gross ( haha like MENS PEE ON THE TOILET SEAT...maybe I'll tell this story later), or in the morning if I don't eat right away.
Now the scary...
What came next was a little unexpected. We were so happy and giddy about just seeing our little guy that we were surprised when my Dr. came in so serious. We said everything looked good on the ultrasound except one thing that was a little concerning. He explained that his Cisterna Magna (the space between his cerebellum and back of his skull, which contains cerebrospinal fluid) was very close to being abnormal. I guess under 10mm is considered "normal" and our little guy's was at 9.7 mm. He recommended that we see a Perinatologist down in Salt Lake City at the University of Utah and possible genetic counseling.
My heart sank. I was trying to be strong and not ball my eyes out, but I know the Dr. could see that I was getting teary eyed and tried to make me feel better. Then I just let it out. I knew I had a nervous feeling for a reason. He said that it could just be his own variant of normal, or it could lead to more serious situations like Dandy Walker Syndrome or even Trisomy 18/19 and might not be able to survive outside the womb. ( but usually these had like 15mm+ measurements). Doing some research it was just plain scary. I found things online that said their child measured at 13mm, and it came out just fine and developed normal. After walking out of the Dr. office and as soon as we hit the car I lost it. The stress of school, hormones, projects, and now this was just too much to handle.
I have an appointment Tuesday down in Salt Lake for a complex ultrasound and whatever else they have planned.
Since then, I have struggled with thinking something could be wrong, but after a while I have come to be OK with it. No matter what happens, my love for this lil guy won't change. Since then, I have felt him kick and be active it just confirms that he is OK, I know Heavenly Father is putting us through this for a reason. I know other women have gone through more than I have such as miscarriage, not able to get pregnant etc. I am so grateful that this is it. I got a priesthood blessing from my Nick and my dad tonight and I immediately felt comfort. Our lesson today in church was to cherish the little moments, and I definitely have little moments I need to be cherishing. It was exactly what I had needed.
I found this video and I think it applies not only to adversity but life in general.
http://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=relmfu&v=tVNYhcYEwIE
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